Desert Sniper

[secobb]

This is a new character I am working on the idea is that he is some sort of post apocalyptic sniper. I am planning to use cloth to give him his shorts and maybe some sort of trench coat. Please be brutal with your criticism pull no punches I cant learn if I don’t get any feedback.

Thanks

[Phynius Gauge]

I really like this idea. I think the ribcage should be more subtle, and some of the muscles slighltly more subtle. The upper body where the pecks are shouldn't cave in like that though, and the upper arm muscles should be fixed a little bit. Keep it coming. Oh and give him a tight ass sniper rifle.

[Phynius Gauge]

Oh and make holes in his gas mask, I don't think he can breath too well at the moment :D

[Stylus]

I like this, you have a nice style and seem to have a good understanding of anatomy, i think the chest area looks fine, really comes down to personal taste.
I think the rag/scarf around his neck could use some more layers to it.
Phynius Gauge - i think the upper chest looks fine for someone that thin, removing things that look even slightly unusual would mean loss of character, and character and style are what seperate a good but rather uninteresting model from a very good model that you remember.
Just my opinion

Stylus...

[Phynius Gauge]

I have never seen anyone with a chest that caves in like that. I am skinnier than that guy and my upper chest does not cave in like that, but, I gues like Stylus said, it comes down to opinion. I think it is a great model and better than I can do, but I don't think that the upper chest is anatomically correct, but that's just my opinion. Aslo, the upper arm should be more round.

[secobb]

Thanks for all the feedback, I agree. Good observation I didn’t see that the deltoid is to angular in the front I need to round it off and add some mass to the back of the same muscle. I know what you’re talking about, the little dip right before it gets to the armpit, and I think I need to make it less drastic, the thing is that’s where all the vertices converge so the slightest topical mistake stands out. But my idea behind making the muscles and rib cage stand out so much is; on body builders there muscles are always really cut, that’s because they dehydrate themselves before bodybuilding events so all the water is out of there fat so it makes them look more ripped. My line of though is that he lives in the desert and dehydration kind of comes with his lifestyle. I don’t know if that’s the right way of thinking its just kind of where my train of though was going. What do you guys think about adding some sort of ankle length coat to go with that collar? I’ll post another pic at the end of the day of how much progress I’m making.

[Phynius Gauge]

A coat sounds like a good idea. Or maybe a hooded cloak. Also could you post the full body image so I can give you more brutal critisism :D .

[neiy0]

looks really nice, yeah the rib cage is a little to noticeable, but that depends on if your going for that look or not..I'm not so sure on the trench coat, cause that would take away from his body, but if it were to be open and u could see in that'd be cool...anyways awsome job!

[DarkLimit]

Dude this character ROCKS.... I love the concept so cool; makes him look dangerous....

I look forward to more updates...

[chaos_seed]

great work I love the style ! ! !I too just think an nice coat 'll fit him perfectly maybe a mix of mexican pancho and african desert coat with multiple layers...
Already looks great but matbe show a bit mor view and add a bit more detail Baut it already is great I must say

KEEP US AWARE !!!

Could we see a low res wire ? and the bag on its own ?

[Murc XIII]

awesome character..I can just imagine him in the desert.

make a nice environment for him, will ya?

[cooldude92_2001]

wow i love it. he would look good with a walking stick. Keep up the good work and keep us posted

[secobb]

Here are the wire frame renders you guys asked for. I just threw the shorts on they will eventually have pockets and I’m going to put some arm wrappings around his wrists. Then I’m going to start his rifle. I like the idea of him having a walking stick. I think ill add that to his gear. Does anyone really love unwrapping UV's in Maya 5 ?!?!?!?!?! If so can u email me. seth@seth3d.com Ill keep u guys posted on my model!

[secobb]

And a whole body GI

[chaos_seed]

looks great ! wire's ok .As i said maybe you could work a bit more an the bagto add small detailmaybe you intended to do them with bump maps...
Can't wait to see more !


Wheras for unwrapping I think no one really is found of it ...But it's so cool after it's finally finished ! ! !

Keep up the good work !

[Phynius Gauge]

I think it is really starting to come together. Those shorts could use some wrinkles, and like you said, pockets. The body looks better too. It looks like a few things need a higher iteration value with the meshmooth, but I can't really tell cause the image is kind of small and there's so much detail. Anyways I like the direction you are taking this. Do you think you could post an up close view of the body and one of the legs, so I can see more of the details. Oh by the way, I use max 6, and I am just learning the UVW unwrap, so I don't think I can help you there:( :D .

[secobb]

Well i think i may be finnished with his body unless there is anyone out there that can give me some sugestions to improve it. Im thinking the shorts look a little off but im going to bump map the hell out of them. Im planning on modeling a walking stick and a sniper rifle for him. Any other accessorie suggestions would be helpful.

[secobb]

More Pics, if asked ill give the wires.

[Phynius Gauge]

Those legs are awesome. So is he a cyborg or something?

[secobb]

I modeled his sniper rifle yesterday and i followed the blueprints for the Hungarian Gepard M1 very closely. I only added the bolt action and a different scope mount. Otherwise it is almost an exact copy of the rifle. Let me know if there is something that looks off about it. Also are there any talented scene modelers who might want to do collaboration on an environment for this character? If so PM me.


(and remember always be brutal with your criticism)

[neiy0]

why did u say to be brutal with comments?? I think you've an outstanding job, and it's one of my favorite threads..:) keep it up..

[chaos_seed]

great ! Just one thing or too thou Maybe you could use some dampers for the legs tehy are fully animated and can give graet effect (also on your model the back of teh dampers aren't made ?why ?)
I also still think the bag needs te be e bit refined cause it looks pretty solid for now as if it was made in some kind of plastick or smooth metal
Anyway realy a good work you have here maybe the gun could use a bit more fantasy such as straps for exemple or somthing to make et cooler cause with that heat must be hard too handel somthing like that Great work keep on going !

[secobb]

I’m not to sure what dampers are, are they the hydraulic parts on the legs? If so that is a smart idea they would look awesome animated. The idea for the pack is that it is made up of some sort of hard corrosive resistant metal or plastic. Maybe I should put some joint seams in it to make it less cloth looking? That strap idea is good, it will make it so he doesn’t have to carry it all the time in the "ready position", Thanks Chaos I’ll keep working on it.

:xyz:

[Goj]

The character looks great, but Ive spoted something funny on the sniper rifle. (As seen below) The nozel seems to shrink at the openning, which seems to show that the bullet will explode when hitting it. :???: Maybe you just forget that, or there might be a good reason for this. If not change it for astetics. Make the bottom part curve like the top, because otherwise it just looks bad to me.

Nice job, looking forward to the texturing.

[DramaticDigital]

Super cool model and idea!

I like the design of the legs except they don’t look like they are meant to move. I think if they were made out the separate objects they would look a lot more functional.

BTW: I love unwrapping UV's in Maya 5

[chaos_seed]

so yeah that's what I was talking about with the legs .In facts it depends on the program you are using 'cause max have some wich are great you only need to say where they are fixed and it works just perfect !
for the straps 'n things yeah I really think it'll be great you now it'll look more like desert rebel survival .Great work keep on going !

I didn't get the idea of the bag but the solid thing ...Why not still i think it'll be better with more detail maybe a peice of metal with the ID on it you know like

"dcv-787-32"
2590

ON AND ON ! ! ! !

[ido]

I like your style secobb, very nice design :)

[neiy0]

DramaticDigital, what do you mean the legs dont look like they can move..there are hinges between for the knees, and ankles, and obviously the shins are not supposed to bend...:???:

Anyways i like the sniper rifle a lot, but yeah i agree with the idea that you need to widen up the end just a smidge, because it seems as though the bullet would get stuck inside the big chamber at the end.. Awsome job so far, keep us posted..;)

[secobb]

Yeah the barrel of the gun does not match the hole in the end. That wouldn't make for very good accuracy would it? I need to line it up with the hole. But that weird end is actually how it is on the gun. I’m UV unwrapping it now so i may have texture at the end of the day today or maybe tomorrow.

[DramaticDigital]

Maybe he has a different idea of how he is going to animate this character than I do. I was just saying that the "hinges" don’t look like they are a separate piece from the rest of the leg. Like they would need to be so that each part of the leg could pivot around them.

[Hank]

hey

just wanted to say u really like this charecter you made..
i dont have any special crit..

just waiting to c what you'll add to him.. (including coloring)

[neiy0]

o i see what you're saying DramaticDigital.. yeah i guess your right, the bolt and pivot point would need to be seperate in order for the legs to opperate correctly..:)

[MonteCristo]

I ain't gonna crit. This is the best piece I've seen all day. It reminds me of the Aeon Flux Cartoon series. Absolutely positively 5* :D

[figo]

nice model !

See this mans work, I think it will help u a bit :)

www.deluxepaint.net



here (http://www.deluxepaint.net )

[Jyncus]

Originally posted by MonteCristo-3DT
I ain't gonna crit. This is the best piece I've seen all day. It reminds me of the Aeon Flux Cartoon series. Absolutely positively 5* :D

Heh, same here.
The body design and style is just like they used in that cartoon.

Very impressive work!
:)

[geoMan]

nice work....looks gr8... it has some likeness of Wiro's snowtrapper model....the mask and the quipment...althugh its a skinny guy! good jb!

[kikimora]

the "hydralics" of the leg thing are awesome :]
really cool character

[chaos_seed]

ok so I 've made you the damper I was talking about just to show you it is already animable you just have to link top and botom and it deform it's self perfectly !

Keep on this is going to be an awsome character !

[Dan-3DT]

It reminds me of the Aeon Flux Cartoon series.

Exactly what I was thinking.

[H13]

now here's my brutal comment ;)

first of all:
the idea is nice and you're on a good way but there are some things that absolutely don't work in my opinion.
That is absolutely no problem so far,
but here are my suggestions for improval:

someone pointed out that you have a good understanding of anatomy..... well....
you could do better ;)

The chest could be more round on the outside. The way it is now is just too straight....it should describe more of a curve towards the deltoid.

also the Muscles on the ripcage shouldn't be so straight from top to bottom. Seen from a side point of view: give them some curve from low back to up front.

And (as far as I can see from your renderings) the shoulders are way too much behind, and they could be a little more closer to the upperbody.

as for the hands: I think they're totally off. take a look at the reference pic I attached. Especially when your character is set up for animation, an incorrect hand may look veeery strange when it grabs something.

hope this helps u.

[secobb]

Yay that’s the kind of brutal crit I like! But here is my rebuttal. I do agree with you H13 on the chest but i need to lower the peck towards the middle i think it plenty round on the outside towards the arm pit. But i have to disagree with the lats being to strait. They are only slightly curved on the human form. As far as the shoulders go you can see from the references bellow that shoulders are set pretty far back on the torso. And the hands? I don’t think they are way off. Well there might be a few discrepancies in the curvature of the fingers but once you skin it u can set the initial position of the bones to correct any of those problems. But that is exactly the kind of crit i needed im going to fix the pecks ASAP.

Thanks for the help H13

[CountZero]

Nice one. I agree that the chest looked pretty bad (seems to be going in the right direction now though), but I think the hands are fine.

[Phynius Gauge]

I think the transitions from the straps to the shorts look strange. I circled the areas in this pic.

[rubberduck]

I think it's a great looking character, just needs a little tweaking here and there;)
I took it into Photoshop, hope you don't mind and tweaked the chest the way I think it should look, if I was doing a character like this;)

[theta]

you need to bring the arms closer in to the chest. people dont have that gap between the chest and arms when they are completely relaxed.

[Jason-Lavoie]

Indeed, and also, once you fix the gap, you need to make the arm muscel (sry i do not know these words) and the shoulder that is connecting to the arm musecl bigger...

BUT IT LOOKS SO SWEET!

[vladimirjp]

the character looks gr8.
i don't think u are limited to conventional human anatomy.
bu one thing, u modeled him with arms and legs so close together, rigging will be difficult.
keep posting updates. :D

[cristi_bumbu]

outstanding modeling: i can wait to see the character textured.
you inspired from the sand people from the game star wars knights of the old republic?

[secobb]

I was kinda inspired by the tuskan raiders from star wars, also the characters from the Dune books, then a little of my own imagination. I agree on the armpits I need to tighten em up, i left the loose like that for skinning then i was going to fix it with a bridge shape. But im going Scuba diving in Florida for a couple of weeks so there wont be any new pics for a while. But ill post it up when i get back.

[Yanik]

Very good modelling, keep up the great work.

Yeah they also remind me of the desert characters wich I saw in the star wars knights of the old republic game.

[embot]

secobb this is looking better and better everytime you post. I'm excited to see it textured. Keep up the good work.

[Staticspector]

Nice work man by chance have you ever heard of Psycho Mantis (Metal gear solid character) he bears a resemblence to him but yours is still unique...

[embot]

When are u going to post!?!?!?!? I want textures:(

[Dedalo]

Nice concept dude , looking good.

[Icey]

It doesn't respect the anatomy... This is my opinion... The (brests??? ) too small..... the belly is not quite like that... You better cover him :)

[secobb]

I disagree and so do most of the people wo read the thread thanks for the crit though.

[Ferry P]

I agree the anatomy could be a bit better...especially his stomach muscles and his chest...like rubberduckie pointed out on the previous page!

but a cool model non the less

[Jyncus]

I think the anatomy is awesome!
It's very stylized.. And I mean, if the pectorial or ab muscles arent perfectly in proportion...who cares? Seriously..c'mon.
People come in all different shapes and sizes - and maybe he isnt going for an ultra realistic "greek model" kinda physique.

*shrug* Heh, I think the whole character looks awesome. Can't wait to see more pics secobb! :)

[secobb]

I am away from my computer so i cant really work in maya but here are some robot designs that i am wanting to make as a "sidekick" for the sniper. These are the torsos that i am trying to decide between i still need to come up with a design for his legs. If anyone has any suggestions for his legs i would apreciate it. I was thinking making them like a scorpions legs. Him living in the desert i thought that, that might make sense. Also there is going to be a little floating droid that follows both of them around. So can you guys pick between robot a and robot b and droid a and droid b. Thatnks a bunch. As soon as i get back from vacation i will finish texturing the sniper and then start on one of these robots.

Feng gets total credit for the concept design

[DBJ]

http://www.artbyfeng.com/

[ido]

this is a little :o :o :o

[JHarford]

very! ,
did you honestly trace all those pictures ?:> thats dedication lol !.

[deejaysoup]

You should give Feng credit for the concept art.

I like robot A and Droid B.

[secobb]

Yeah i never said that i drew those myself or came up with the idea myself. He gets total credit for the concept. The model wont be an exact copie anyway. Im going to give droid b legs (like a chetah) and make his lower base an Abrams Tank. My idea is that he atacks vehicles then inserts himself into them and then he can use them as a weapon.

ido: dont go acusing me of trying to take credit for someone elses work. I made no claim that it was my own, i was simply asking peoples opinion of the design.

[JHarford]

sorry but that isnt the point ,
you made no attempts to say the work was not your own .
posting an image with your thread , unless stated assumptions are made it is your own work.

[ido]

I wasn’t accusing you of anything secobb :) I just thought it was embarrassing not to give credit to the artist when you post his work in your own thread. But never mind, no harm done (I think), his concepts are great and I’m sure they will look awesome after you will do some 3d work on them, it looks like you are also very talented.

[JHarford]

how come you havent changed much on the model in the whole 5 pages of the thread?.youve had a lot of good crit and this deserves those changes. could you post an updated version with the pecks fixed?
and also a closeup wire of the back of the head

[bullethead]

Originally posted by cgstripe
how come you havent changed much on the model in the whole 5 pages of the thread?.youve had a lot of good crit and this deserves those changes. could you post an updated version with the pecks fixed?
and also a closeup wire of the back of the head Yes...I was wondering the same

[secobb]

I dont want to sound like a dick but if you two guys have been reading my thread i said on page 4 that i was going to go on vacation for a couple of weaks and i would be away from my computer so i cant to any work. I do apreciate all the great CRIT that all of you guys have been giving me. Im on vacation scubadiving in florida and as soon as i get back to Colorado i am going to work my ass off and I'll put it up so all of you who have been giving me great feedback can see what im doing.

[Phynius Gauge]

Sounds good... Can't wait to see whats in store :) .

[bullethead]

Originally posted by secobb
I dont want to sound like a dick but if you two guys have been reading my thread i said on page 4 that i was going to go on vacation for a couple of weaks and i would be away from my computer so i cant to any work. I do apreciate all the great CRIT that all of you guys have been giving me. Im on vacation scubadiving in florida and as soon as i get back to Colorado i am going to work my ass off and I'll put it up so all of you who have been giving me great feedback can see what im doing. Im srry if I came off as a dick. didnt mean too...I just wanted to see an update. Cause I love everything youve done so far here in this thread.

[secobb]

Thanks evryone for your posts and comments

Bullethead: no hard feelings mate!

:dance:

:dance:

[Teyon]

I have to say, I'm loving the details in the model. Keep going!

[Chris-3DT]

[i]ido: dont go acusing me of trying to take credit for someone elses work. I made no claim that it was my own, i was simply asking peoples opinion of the design. [/B]

If something is posted without credit explicitly given, everyone assumes that theone who posted it, made it. while you weren't saying that you made it, you also were not saying you did not make it.

In general however it is almost ridiculous to assume that anyone can get away with stealing one of Feng's designs, so nobody would try, I should think.

We consider this settled and continue with the thread - where is that damned cool desert sniper-update?!
:D

[artist71]

Im going to point out something obvious. In the bottom right hand corner of the concept by Feng is his autograph.
Anyway, back to your sniper. He sure is looking good. The mistakes that I see have already been mentioned. Mainly in the armpit area.

Later

[JHarford]

heh