Small Commercial

MartinBrixx · 20-07-2006, 10:21 AM

Hey guys this is a small project im working on at school. We had to choose a company and develop some sorta of artistic way of making it look good, This is what I got so far for a rough draft. The sparks will be renderd seperately in maya, rather than combustions particles effects and so will the smoke. Im just gonna keep the fireworks and logo at the end. C&C are always welcomed.

Lazy Link

ItsaMystery · 20-07-2006, 11:47 AM

Pretty cool for a short commercial project

I like the fireworks at the end. When you re-do the sparks, I'd make them a little bigger and have less of a trail. The current sparks almost look like mini-fireworks. Also, the smoke looks a bit flat/2D/cartoonish, compared to the style of the rest of the animation. I know you said you're going to redo them in Maya, so I figured they're placeholder, but just thought I'd give my feedback anyway

Pretty nice job overall!

MartinBrixx · 20-07-2006, 04:53 PM

So bigger sparks with less time? Yea, it was definitely a place holder. Thanks for the C&C bro.

Kage · 20-07-2006, 07:12 PM

Its nice, but here are a few helpful crits.

First of all, the sparks move too fast, and yeah, leave too much of a trail.

The box also seems to fall for too long, with the sparks not looking right for the box.

So basically, slow down some action, but also speed some bits up.

Good visualisation though.

MartinBrixx · 20-07-2006, 08:03 PM

yea i wanted to have like a slow mo efftect while its up in the air. yea, sparks are gonna be cut to a tee. Thanks Kage!

Rip_shot · 20-07-2006, 08:14 PM

I cant say I'm impressed, where did the box come from? the box looks really weird, why is it a box? I really dont understand the commercial,

MartinBrixx · 20-07-2006, 08:47 PM

Oh I forgot to mention that your suppose to use a box and something is suppose to happen to it. There really isnt no prolouge before an introduction, I will add a curb and a background plate as well. What looks weird on the box?

Rip_shot · 20-07-2006, 08:52 PM

the door to the box, it bounces around unrealisticly but I'm sure you'll make a more detailed box hehe, I probably would have made a bedroom scene with a box shaking in a night scene as the camera creeps up and then the box busts open and some cars fly out and hot road tracks start to form under the cars as they race across the room with the camera doing some close up tracking and stuff... hehe

MartinBrixx · 21-07-2006, 12:06 AM

Oh yea for sure! Hey, that would be an awesome commercial Rip, nt.

Edhead · 21-07-2006, 12:58 AM

I dont know if its just me but after seeing that video I felt awkward lol. I agree with Rip Shot, the box animation needs to look like its not on the moon.

ItsaMystery · 21-07-2006, 02:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MartinBrixx

So bigger sparks with less time? Yea, it was definitely a place holder. Thanks for the C&C bro.

No prob

20-07-2006, 10:21 AM	#1
MartinBrixx CG Artist - Modeler Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Toronto Posts: 162 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Small Commercial Hey guys this is a small project im working on at school. We had to choose a company and develop some sorta of artistic way of making it look good, This is what I got so far for a rough draft. The sparks will be renderd seperately in maya, rather than combustions particles effects and so will the smoke. Im just gonna keep the fireworks and logo at the end. C&C are always welcomed. Lazy Link __________________ Runner Up: Patio Furniture

20-07-2006, 11:47 AM	#2
ItsaMystery >>[ n1nj4 ]<< Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: n1nj4-ville, USA Posts: 280 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Pretty cool for a short commercial project I like the fireworks at the end. When you re-do the sparks, I'd make them a little bigger and have less of a trail. The current sparks almost look like mini-fireworks. Also, the smoke looks a bit flat/2D/cartoonish, compared to the style of the rest of the animation. I know you said you're going to redo them in Maya, so I figured they're placeholder, but just thought I'd give my feedback anyway Pretty nice job overall! __________________ :n1nj4:

20-07-2006, 04:53 PM	#3
MartinBrixx CG Artist - Modeler Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Toronto Posts: 162 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	So bigger sparks with less time? Yea, it was definitely a place holder. Thanks for the C&C bro. __________________ Runner Up: Patio Furniture

20-07-2006, 07:12 PM	#4
Kage Perfectionist... Join Date: May 2006 Location: UK Posts: 3,650 Thanks: 36 Thanked 66 Times in 61 Posts Awards Showcase Total Awards: 5	Its nice, but here are a few helpful crits. First of all, the sparks move too fast, and yeah, leave too much of a trail. The box also seems to fall for too long, with the sparks not looking right for the box. So basically, slow down some action, but also speed some bits up. Good visualisation though. __________________ First Finished Project: Z-5500 Speaker Set Current WIP Projects: Korg Krome from PMC Xbox 360 set Older WIP Projects (Some dead for now): Z-5500 Speaker Set WIP (Now Finished) Dance Pad Model (DDR/DS) WIP

20-07-2006, 08:03 PM	#5
MartinBrixx CG Artist - Modeler Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Toronto Posts: 162 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	yea i wanted to have like a slow mo efftect while its up in the air. yea, sparks are gonna be cut to a tee. Thanks Kage! __________________ Runner Up: Patio Furniture

20-07-2006, 08:14 PM	#6
Rip_shot Lighting Artist Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Toronto, ON Posts: 767 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	I cant say I'm impressed, where did the box come from? the box looks really weird, why is it a box? I really dont understand the commercial,

20-07-2006, 08:47 PM	#7
MartinBrixx CG Artist - Modeler Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Toronto Posts: 162 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Oh I forgot to mention that your suppose to use a box and something is suppose to happen to it. There really isnt no prolouge before an introduction, I will add a curb and a background plate as well. What looks weird on the box? __________________ Runner Up: Patio Furniture

20-07-2006, 08:52 PM	#8
Rip_shot Lighting Artist Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Toronto, ON Posts: 767 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	the door to the box, it bounces around unrealisticly but I'm sure you'll make a more detailed box hehe, I probably would have made a bedroom scene with a box shaking in a night scene as the camera creeps up and then the box busts open and some cars fly out and hot road tracks start to form under the cars as they race across the room with the camera doing some close up tracking and stuff... hehe

21-07-2006, 12:06 AM	#9
MartinBrixx CG Artist - Modeler Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Toronto Posts: 162 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Oh yea for sure! Hey, that would be an awesome commercial Rip, nt. __________________ Runner Up: Patio Furniture

21-07-2006, 12:58 AM	#10
Edhead The SEXY Master Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: California Posts: 157 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	I dont know if its just me but after seeing that video I felt awkward lol. I agree with Rip Shot, the box animation needs to look like its not on the moon. __________________ Reality is merely an illusion…

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